My Life is a Mess (And I’m Proud Of It)
Life is messy. It’s just how it is. Being human isn’t always the easiest thing in the world. There is a lot of learning that happens while we’re in our human forms. Sometimes we like the things we learn and sometimes those lessons are tough. Sometimes we’d prefer to avoid the lesson entirely.
I think we all get into places where we want to scream “Stop the world! I want to get off!”, and I admit, I’ve done that more than once in my lifetime. The truth is though, as I look back on some of the crazy choices I made, what they led to and how I got to where I am now, I don’t regret any of it. It’s what has made me who I am sitting here writing this. I wouldn’t change that.
My life is a mess now because I’ve outgrown the old choices I made. It’s not a mess because I made bad choices. I did what I needed to do at the time. It’s a mess because I’ve changed and grown. I have to give myself permission to do that, continually. It’s okay to outgrow where you are, even if it makes your life look chaotic in the moment. The chaos is short-lived. The experience is invaluable and the lessons are forever.
Stop regretting your life! You made choices, you did things and you learned from them. It’s not a waste of time, energy or focus. It’s what you needed to do at the time. It moved you forward. It’s okay to turn around now and decide you want to do something different. This idea that we’ve been given in society that says we should pick a career path and stick with it for 30-years is bullsh!t! The same is true for relationships. Not everybody is meant to have a life partner and a 50-year marriage. It’s terrific if you have those things and that’s what you want. But for the rest of us that aren’t there and may never get there, that’s okay too.
Give yourself permission to change your mind! Even if it messes up your life. Even if people around you don’t like it. Even if it seems crazy to everybody else. It’s okay to make new choices. It’s okay to change your mind. It’s okay to do your own thing. It’s okay to be okay. You don’t have to answer to anybody except yourself. Tell the world what you’re doing and do it. Stop asking for permission because you’ll never get it. People want you to stay in their comfort zones. They will never allow you to do things that make them uncomfortable. That’s human nature. We project our own fears, biases, worries and concerns onto other people. If we let that stop us, we never move forward and we’ve never happy.
I’ve spent 45-years living my life for other people. I’ve posted a bit recently about the lie my life has been for so many years. Go back and look if you’re curious. The truth is I’m tired. I’m tired of the bullsh!t! I’m tired of the lies. I’m tired of hiding. I’m tired of making other people comfortable. My writing and my work might trigger you now. I’m sorry if that’s the case. But I will not apologize for my truth any longer. I would encourage you to stop apologizing for yours too.
Show up for yourself. Nobody else is going to do it for you!
Lots of love.
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