Using Your Power With Money

I’ve taken some risks over the years to be in business for myself. I’ve avoided taking a full-time job even when most of the world would probably tell me getting a job was a good idea because financial disaster was imminent or occurring. My credit rating is well, awful, there is no savings or retirement plan and we live pretty much paycheck to paycheck. We are that family that is a $300 problem away from homelessness. It sounds tragic, doesn’t it? It’s not.

The truth is I haven’t understood my own power and I still struggle with some of it even now. But I wanted to share with you a story that happened this week because it shows what’s possible when we allow ourselves to use our own power instead of drowning it out in a pool of fear and worry.

Pretty much all of the old debt I had while I was teaching computers many years ago went to collections. I’m still paying off a couple of those old debts now. So this one I’ve been paying for a while was to the tune of over $6000 originally. I’ve chipped at it now and it’s down around $1500 but they are running out of patience with me and are threatening to let the bank scoop it out of my bank account. It would just send the bank account into an overdrawn status. The old story is that I’d probably have to let the bank account go and eventually it too would end up in collections.

These types of stories are part of my life. This is what I’ve been dealing with on and off for years. I have disempowered myself over time because of the amount of fear and worry I’ve injected into my money story. I’ve set it up as something outside of myself that I don’t have control over. That lie is what my financial world has been based on for most of my adult life.

Loans and things aren’t an option for me at the moment for many reasons. This particular collection agency had told me last week that I needed to either find a loan or they would send it back to the bank who would simply take the non-existent money from my bank account. They gave me the weekend to figure that out.

On Monday I called them back and I explained that loans and things aren’t an option and there is nobody around me right now that can help me. I understood that he needed to do his job and that this was just the way things needed to be. I was very honest with him about my situation and the reality of what would happen.

Human compassion is a thing. He has given me another 3 months to, in his words, find a way to settle the debt. For me, that means I have 3 months to heal the remaining story around this and create the money I need to solve the problem. Essentially I manifested time. The way I created that was by not buying into the old story. I stayed out of fear, I managed to do some writing that day. I flipped the script. I didn’t let my mind have a party with it. I had accepted the hand I had been dealt and was finding ways to deal with it. When I called him, because I was honest and real instead of combative, I got compassion and time instead of trouble.

One of the lessons I’ve been in, certainly through 2020, and now as we begin 2021, is that I’m being shown my own power. I get given situations, financial ones like this are common, and I get shown how to handle them without fear and worry. I get shown how to use my power to my own advantage instead of disempowering myself the way I have done in the past. Learning to use and step into my own power is what will allow me to be successful in the long run.

When I say “take your power back” this is the stuff that I mean. These are the scenarios and situations that we find ourselves in all the time. We place the situation outside of ourselves, claim we have no control, throw our hands up in the air, and walk away in frustration. We solve that problem but then a similar problem comes up again somewhere in the future. We may recognize the repeating pattern and wonder why it happens, but still refuse to use the power we do have. The truth is we do have control and far more than we give ourselves credit for. I just lived through a very vivid example of exactly that. This is a repeating pattern that I’ve insisted I have no control over, but it keeps showing up because I do have control over it. I’m being shown how to take that control back and I need to take that power back because it’s part of creating the life that I want.

Pay attention to what happens around you. Before throwing your hands up and deciding it’s out of your control, stop and breathe. What is in your power? What control do you have? How can you use it?

It’s easy to say that things are outside of ourselves. Sometimes, as I did, we use it as a cop-out. We don’t take control because we don’t want to deal with it. It’s disempowering for us and it keeps us in a loop. We don’t have to stay there, it’s a choice. But until we’re ready to acknowledge our own power, the loop will keep happening. When we’re ready to find our power inside of ourselves and do that inner work, the loop will stop, until then it will wait for us until we’re ready for it.

Love to all.

Laura

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